Hello lovely humans!
It’s been a busy and stressful week. I have one word that touches on every emotion I felt the past 7 days: S.H.I.T. Butt not for the reasons you may assume. nailed it.
I treated myself to an adorable bidet from HelloTushy and my life has been forever changed.
When it comes to zero waste I’ve hit 2 roadblocks- 1. periods. 2. toilet time.
I tried, you guys, butt I am seriously not ready to use reusable toilet paper aka butt rags. I may be on that track now that I have a bidet, butt… baby steps. For now, this is what my bathroom set up looks like:
Booty-ful. Don’t worry, I stacked the TP Pyramid just for that picture, I’m not actually that anal. Goodness this is fun.
We got the bidet for $69 (spend $15 more and you can get the “Tushy Spa”, complete with heated water! Oo lala!) and 12 rolls of bamboo toilet paper for $18. I opted for bamboo toilet paper over recycled toilet paper because… well because of these articles: HuffPost, The Healthy Home Economist, The Eco Mum, The Cheeky Panda, and a bunch more. Bottom line: bleach is bad for your butthole (unless.. you do that I guess?), the fluffier our toilet paper is the worse it most likely is for our environment, and the process of turning recycled paper into recycled TP can leave dangerous chemicals behind. Ladies, I’m not gonna sugar coat this: 9 out of 10 conservatives agree, your butt is right next to your vagina (that one just doesn’t want to openly admit it). I may not be an expert when it comes to anatomy butt I do know that most people wipe both… Ideally. And our vaginal PH is very delicate. Not knowing what’s in our tampons and our toilet paper is something we should not settle for anymore.
Butt back to this bidet. It takes 10 minutes to install. No electric connection necessary and all parts included. Except a flathead screwdriver. You’ll need that. The dial helps you control the water pressure and the little lever thingy let’s you position the spout. It’s amazing and I have truly never felt cleaner in my entire life.
The toilet paper came wrapped in paper packaging and the bidet came wrapped in paper packaging as well, you can check out my instagram post for more information on that @alteredecoplanet
P.S- The other title for this post was “Crapshoot- a bums guide to choosing the right bidet”. There really aren’t nearly enough bidet puns out there. Even the Europeans couldn’t help me out!